Don't be a moron.

Time and time again I talk to a founder who can't get a single VC to take them seriously. And time and time again they don't know why, and think it's about the business or the product, or even their hard skills. The communication style of founders can significantly influence their chances of securing investment. It’s not just about what founders say, but how they say it that matters. Today I'ma yatter on about two distinct types of openness — genuine openness and strategic openness — and how they can affect the founder's relationships with potential investors.

Understanding Genuine vs. Strategic Openness

Genuine openness involves a true receptiveness to feedback and different viewpoints. It’s characterized by a willingness to consider and possibly integrate external insights into the business model. Conversely, strategic openness is more about appearing receptive in order to placate or impress others, without a real intention to consider or adopt the feedback given.

Role-Play Scenario 1: Genuine Openness

Situation: You're pitching to a VC who questions the scalability of your current business model and suggests an alternative approach.

Dialogue:

  • VC: "Have you considered adopting a subscription model to enhance scalability?"
  • Founder: "That's an interesting point. Could you elaborate on how you see that working for our product?"
  • VC: "A subscription model could ensure a steady revenue stream and deepen customer engagement."
  • Founder: "I appreciate that perspective. It’s something we’ve considered briefly, but I see now how it could add value. I’ll discuss this further with my team."

This scenario demonstrates genuine openness, where the founder actively engages with the VC’s feedback and shows a real interest in exploring the idea further.

Role-Play Scenario 2: Strategic Openness

Situation: An investor criticizes your marketing strategy during a feedback session.

Dialogue:

  • Investor: "I think your current marketing approach might be too broad to effectively capture your target audience."
  • Founder: "I appreciate your input, but our broad strategy has served us well in terms of market coverage and customer acquisition."
  • Investor: "Narrowing your focus could increase conversion rates and customer loyalty."
  • Founder: "That’s an interesting point. I’ll take that into consideration."

Here, the founder uses strategic openness, acknowledging the investor’s points but with no real intention of revisiting the marketing strategy. The founder’s responses are polite but non-committal, aimed more at maintaining a facade of receptiveness.

The Impact of Openness on Founder-Investor Relationships

The type of openness a founder exhibits can profoundly impact their relationships with investors. Genuine openness fosters trust and collaboration, key elements in forming strong, lasting partnerships. In contrast, strategic openness might initially smooth over disagreements, but over time it can erode trust and hinder genuine connections.

Encouraging Genuine Openness

For founders looking to cultivate genuine openness, it’s crucial to practice active listening, reflect on feedback thoughtfully, and engage in honest dialogues with potential investors. This not only improves their business strategies but also builds stronger, more authentic relationships with those who could be instrumental in their success.


Arrogance is often perceived as an inflated sense of one's worth or abilities, usually manifested in overt confidence that can border on aggression or disrespect towards others' viewpoints or competencies. This trait, while sometimes subtle, can profoundly affect both personal interactions and professional relationships. In this post, we'll explore the roots of arrogance and its implications, not just in business settings but in all areas of life.

The Psychological Underpinnings of Arrogance

At its core, arrogance may stem from a deep-seated insecurity or a defensive mechanism to mask perceived inadequacies. Psychologically, it can be seen as a person's method to control how others perceive them, by projecting an image of self-sufficiency and superiority. This behavior, ironically, often alienates others and can lead to isolation, the very outcome the arrogant person might fear the most.

Arrogance in Daily Interactions

In everyday life, arrogance can manifest in various ways: interrupting others, dismissing alternative opinions, or asserting one’s views without considering the context or feelings of others. These behaviors not only hinder effective communication but also impair relationship building, which is fundamental to both personal happiness and professional success.

The Professional Fallout of Arrogance

In the workplace, especially in high-stakes environments like startups or venture capital, arrogance can be particularly detrimental. It might initially appear as unwavering confidence, which is often prized in leaders. However, over time, it becomes clear that arrogance stifles collaboration, limits diverse thinking, and creates a culture of fear or resentment, rather than one of mutual respect and innovation.

Overcoming Arrogance with Self-awareness and Empathy

The antidote to arrogance often lies in developing greater self-awareness and practicing empathy. Recognizing one’s own limitations, being open to feedback, and genuinely valuing others' contributions can transform interactions and relationships. Here are a few steps individuals can take to curb arrogance:

  • Regular Self-Reflection: Engage in honest self-evaluation regularly. Acknowledge your flaws and areas for improvement.
  • Seek Feedback: Actively seek and openly accept feedback without defensiveness. Use it as a tool for personal and professional growth.
  • Practice Active Listening: Focus on truly understanding others' points of view without planning your rebuttal as they speak.
  • Cultivate Humility: Celebrate your achievements but recognize the role of others in your successes. Understand that no one is infallible or indispensable.

The Ripple Effects of Combating Arrogance

Addressing arrogance doesn't just improve individual interactions; it enhances entire communities and workplaces. By fostering an environment where every voice is valued and where leaders are approachable and reflective, organizations can thrive. The shift from arrogance to humility and openness can lead to more innovative ideas, more resilient teams, and ultimately, more successful outcomes.

The NEED for active listening

Active listening is far more than just hearing the words others speak; it is about fully comprehending and engaging with the speaker's message in a thoughtful and meaningful way. This skill is crucial in combating arrogance, as it shifts the focus from oneself to the speaker, fostering a deeper connection and understanding.

Key Components of Active Listening

  • Full Attention: Give the speaker your undivided attention. This means putting aside distracting thoughts and devices to truly focus on the dialogue.
  • Nonverbal Cues: Use nonverbal signals such as nodding, maintaining eye contact, and leaning forward slightly to show engagement and encourage the speaker.
  • Reflecting and Clarifying: Paraphrase what the speaker has said to ensure understanding. Ask clarifying questions to dig deeper into their thoughts and feelings.
  • Withholding Judgment: Resist the urge to judge or mentally criticize what’s being said. This allows the speaker to express themselves fully without fear of immediate critique.
  • Responding Appropriately: Offer appropriate responses that indicate you have understood the message, and contribute your thoughts in a way that builds on the conversation.

The Impact of Active Listening

Practicing active listening can transform interactions and relationships. For individuals prone to arrogance, it helps shift their perspective from a need to dominate the conversation to a more balanced, reciprocal communication style. In professional settings, it enhances teamwork and problem-solving by ensuring all viewpoints are heard and considered. In personal relationships, it builds trust and intimacy, as individuals feel truly heard and valued.

Continued Practice for Mastery

Like any skill, active listening requires practice and commitment to master. It involves being present in each conversation, continually reminding oneself to listen fully and engage sincerely. Over time, this can become a natural part of how one interacts, significantly reducing tendencies toward arrogance and enhancing both personal growth and professional success.